Don’t get me wrong, I love my fellas, but this week what I have to say is strictly for my ladies (and in some cases I am using this word very lightly).No matter how you look or where you come from, a true lady is a treasure for all to behold. I say this because due to things I have witnessed lately, I know some of my “sistas” need reminding and I am here to uplift you.
Let me tell you something about men. In life men seek two different types of women, the first is the woman he would love to raise his children with and the second is the one whose accidental pregnancy would result in his attempted suicide. Which woman are you? Maybe you are so blinded by your behavior that you do not know whether you are type one or type two; so, I will clarify a few definitive indications that you are a type two gal.
You are a type two girl if…
(1) He ignores you in public or only says “Hi” when he sees you alone.
(2) You’ve never met any of his friends.
(3) He only calls after midnight.
(4) It’s been three months and the only dates he ever takes you on are to your bedroom.
(5) If the two of you do go out you always drive and you always pay.
(6) You’ve never seen the inside of his apartment.
(7) He doesn’t seem interested in your life (i.e. he doesn’t ask about your day).
(8) Birthday? Christmas? Valentine’s Day?
(9) He never talks about the future.
I’m sorry to report this, but if any combination of these things seems familiar to you then you are the wrong kind of woman.
Now, what people think about you is their business, but how people treat you is your business. The same way you snap and curse out your fellow female is the same way you should put a man in his place who treats you like less than a lady. I know a lot of times we cling to men out of the fear of being alone, but you can do bad all by yourself. Every time you give of yourself and your soul to this man you are losing pieces of yourself that you may never regain. Not to mention the damage you do to your reputation and the subconscious self-hate that comes along with promiscuity.
Type One Women, keep doing what you are doing. I know it seems as if the majority of men on campus are not interested in what you have to offer right now. Do not fret or compromise your standards and integrity. When these boys metamorphose into men and are ready to settle down, the only women they will remember will be of refined character and dignity.
Each relationship you have should be mutual preparation for marriage. Go on lots of dates, college is the galleria for the male mate selection process, but when you decide to make the dinner-and-a-movie-man your boyfriend make sure he’s worth the practice. I was once told to always view myself as the ultimate prize, “and if the boy isn’t treating you like the damn Heisman Trophy leave the dog where he lays.