Recently, I was involved in a conversation between my female and male friends addressing the issue of black males falling off in society. Throughout the discussion, the females agreed that the problem with males was that we must “conform to society” to be men. The more I absorbed this statement, the more I understood it to be misleading. In my opinion, to conform to society is to meet the requirements of the general public, which we call America.
As a black man, I personally don’t believe this will ever happen. The black culture has mixed blood within American soil, using sweat as tears in the fight to survive this “American dream.” We weren’t brought over here as equals from the start, so how can black men ever conform to society? So the case isn’t why aren’t black men meeting the requirements of society, the argument is why are those who consider themselves black men, not being real black men?
I was taught that a man is one who knows and understands his responsibilities and what is needed to survive. In addition to being black, mental stability and contributing help and support to those who need it are also important. These days, especially in college, the idea of being a man has changed. Most of these so-called “men” are just grown boys.
So, how many of us really consider ourselves men? Is it that you can pay your own rent, phone bill, and car note? Or maybe that you had a kid and decided to be in his or her life unlike your own father. No sir! These things have nothing to do with it and they make you no more of a man.
I consider these things “causes,” and the “effect” is standing by your morals and understanding how to prioritize. Set a good example. These children are like wet cement; whatever falls on them makes an impression. As a “man” what impression are you leaving?