Have you ever thought, “What is the virtuous man?” The Bible does not distinctly reveal to us the “virtuous” man as it does the virtuous woman. By looking at a few men God used in the Bible (Joseph, David, Job, Paul, and Timothy), a conclusion can be made that a virtuous man is a godly man. Now you may ask, “What is a godly man?” So take a walk with me thru the Bible to reveal the characteristics of a godly man.To be a godly man, you must first of all confess with your tongue that Jesus is the Son of God and believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead so you will be saved (Romans 10:9). This allows you to receive the spirit of God, which separates you from the world as described in I Corinthians 2:12.
The integrity that a man possesses is an important part of being a godly man. Integrity is giving your word and keeping it (Exodus 8:28-32), more valuable than riches (Proverbs 28:6), and it should set an example (Titus 2:7). Even though David sinned by committing adultery with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 12:1-2), he understood the importance of integrity. David knew that integrity and uprightness would protect him (Psalm 25:21) from bad company whom may corrupt his character.
Integrity is also the faithfulness to moral principles and honesty. There is a saying that, “the way a man thinks, is the way he sees.” The major idea in any relationship, whether it be with God, family, or friends is honesty. In order for us men to preach honesty, we must be honest with ourselves. Stop trying to be pimps, players, sugar daddies, sperm donors, etc and be what God needs you to be. Let’s give our women something to look forward to instead of stereotypes, lies, and deceits that the African American male tends to bring. A portion of Proverbs 20:6-7 reads, “A faithful man who can find? The just man walks in his integrity…” Many of our black women believe that a good man of integrity is rare or hard to find.
The next characteristic is a man who follows and waits on God. If a man waits upon the Lord, he shall, as the Bible states, “be blessed, inherit the earth, be saved, renew his strength, and receive the glorious things prepared by God.” These are just a few blessings from God if you follow and wait on Him. Following and waiting on God is nothing but having indubitable faith that He will take care of you, as long as you stay in His will.
A great example of a man of faith is found in the book of Job. Even though Job went through many trials and tribulations while questioning God for what was happening to him, he still kept his faith claiming God as his redeemer (Job 19:23-29). Through the midst of his darkest hour, Job understood that the Lord can give and take away as he pleases (Job 1:20-22) and decided to stay in His will.
Some of us decide to go outside the will of God because we may feel things are not going the way we want them to or nothing is going right in life. When we as men, especially the African American male, begin to fall out of His will, we start to fit into those stereotypes put on us by society. We get caught up in drugs/alcohol, fornication, and in the penitentiaries. We allow ourselves to live a life that was not meant for us. If we as men take the initiative to be aggressive when it comes to dwelling in God’s word (not just reading it) and serving Him with as much time as we spend trying to attract a female or hustling to get rich, not even Satan could keep us from staying in God’s will.
When we do not follow God, we sometimes change with circumstances. We allow others to lead us instead of being leaders of ourselves. No virtuous woman or maybe any woman needs a man who cannot follow God, let alone make his own decisions. By having faith in God, we must trust God more than our capacity to understand God’s ways.
When it comes to marriage, the Bible states that the man is the head of the household (Ephesians 5:23-24). This is saying that the man should be the spiritual leader as Christ is the leader of the church. Men, this does not mean that you are the master over your woman. It does not give you the right to command her around nor beat her physically or verbally. God put women on earth to work side by side with their men. The previous sentence said “side by side” not beneath. God didn’t take a bone from the bottom of Adam’s foot (which would seem like women are beneath men), but from his side (Genesis 2:21-24).
Men should love their wives as Christ loves the church and love them as he loves his own body (Ephesians 5:25-30). Here are a few points for marriage as well as relationships. Men, in our relationships and marriages, we must have a united purpose to serve the Lord, faithfulness, commitment, sacrifice, mutual submission, communication, and an understanding of each other’s differences while celebrating them when it comes to being in a relationship with women. When we allow temptation and lust to overcome our better judgment, we cheat on, disrespect, and misuse our women. The points mentioned above get thrown out the window. If you are not going to treat your woman right or even attempt to, have the integrity to be honest with her from the beginning. We need to stop putting on a mask to get the girl, and then in the middle of the relationship, show your true colors. God will test and judge your integrity even in a relationship (1 Chronicles 29:17, Psalm 7:8). The Lord hates lies and lack of integrity (Zachariah 8:16-17).
God has chosen us men to be more than just women chasers, drug users/dealers, weed smokers, pimps, players, and baby makers. He has chosen us to be godly men who embody integrity, faith, and obedience to him. The challenge to you men is to flee youthful lust, and to avoid foolish and ignorant disputes. But pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart (2 Timothy 22-25). Let us become leaders in our households and communities instead of being the problem. Are you prepared to be that godly man?